I Can Cook!
by sockheadx
Summary: /Challenge Fic!/ In which Gakuto attempts to make dinner and Oshitari attempts to get out of eating it. Written for SkyGem's ABC challenge.


**Disclaimer:** I don't own; just abusing them for my own amusement. Poor Gaku-chii.

All characters in this story are over the age of 18.

**A/N: **This was done for **SkyGem**'s ABC challenge: to write a Prince of Tennis fic where, starting with "a" and ending with "z," every paragraph uses a consecutive letter of the alphabet. I chose Dirty Pair because I haven't written a fic with them yet and I felt guilty for neglecting one of my favorite pairings. ^^;

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><p>"Another long day," Oshitari Yuushi sighed. He allowed the door to his spacious dorm room (more of an apartment, really) to swing shut behind him. A strange scent intrusively wafted into his nose and he forced himself not to contemplate it.<p>

Bringing his hand up to his face, he rubbed at tired eyes behind non-prescription lenses. He'd hoped it would ease the tension headache he'd developed, but he felt no better.

"Cutie-pie! Is that you?" a familiar voice rang from the kitchen.

Dropping his backpack messily onto the floor, Oshitari moved towards the source of the voice (and probably the cause of the smell): his boyfriend and roommate, Mukahi Gakuto.

"Expecting someone else?" he teased and pressed a light kiss to a soft pale cheek.

"Food's almost ready." Gakuto motioned off-handedly to the pot of…something that was boiling away on the stove. Oshitari wasn't sure he really wanted to know what was in it. "And no, only you, silly," he finally answered with a grin.

"Gakuto, you…cook?" Oshitari raised a doubtful eyebrow.

"He-e-ey! Yuushi's so mean!" Gakuto pouted his cute pink lips in protest. "Of course I cook! Can't everyone? It's not hard to put a bunch of stuff in a pot and turn the stove on."

"Is…is that what you did?" Oshitari peered into the large silver stew pot. Dark, vaguely purple glop in the bottom of the thick metal container gurgled and bubbled ominously. He immediately lost any appetite he may have had when he came home.

"Just try some!" Gakuto exclaimed in exasperation. "It can't be that bad, right?"

Kindly smiling for the sake of his boyfriend's feelings, Oshitari nodded. 'Maybe it tastes better than it smells,' he reasoned with himself. Upon seeing something large and unshapely floating to the surface in a bubble, however, he quickly changed his mind. He took a step back just seconds before the bubble popped and splattered globs of an unrecognizable substance onto the walls of the pot. No, there was no way he was swallowing that. He probably wouldn't live long enough to finish a bowl.

"Love," he whispered flirtatiously, "I can think of better things to do with my mouth right now." Perhaps he could make Gakuto forget all about this disaster of a dinner.

"Mmm," Gakuto hummed happily. "Maybe you can show me some of those things…right after dinner!"

No, of course Gakuto wouldn't be distracted that easily. He sighed. If words weren't enough, then….

Oshitari moved behind his lover and wrapped his hands around his lithe little acrobat's waist. His hands met around Gakuto's taut apron-clad tummy while his lips ghosted along the right side of that graceful pale neck. His tongue flicked out to tease an earlobe.

"Please, Gakuto?" he pleaded with a husky voice. "I don't think I can wait until after dinner."

"Quit that!" Gakuto's hand came up and rubbed at the teased side of his neck. "That's not fair!" he whined.

"Really? It isn't?" Two lips pressed to the fingers of the hand that Gakuto still had against his throat. A smirk formed across Oshitari's mouth. Did Gakuto really think that would deter him? In one quick motion, Gakuto's index and middle fingers were sucked into Oshitari's hot moist mouth.

"S-stop! Yuushi, that's…!" Gakuto's attempts to dissuade Oshitari were completely unsuccessful as the latter effortlessly showed the former a very good representation of what he could be doing with his mouth at this very moment.

Tongue circling the fingers in his mouth at an agonizingly slow pace, Oshitari expertly evaded the stomach-churning concoction that Gakuto had pronounced "dinner." He took a tentative step backward and found that Gakuto followed him. Smiling around the fingers still in his mouth, he walked the two toward the bedroom they shared.

Uncultivated words left Gakuto's mouth when he saw their destination and Oshitari groaned. He loved it when Gakuto talked dirty.

"Very…smooth, Yuushi," Gakuto rasped out. He quickly shut the door behind them and pulled his fingers from Oshitari's mouth. With his breathing quite labored, he continued, "but now you have to finish what you started."

"Willingly," he responded with a smirk. He pulled his glasses from his face and placed them on the bench at the foot of their bed. His shirt quickly followed.

Xanthous hair bobbed about a pale face as Gakuto flopped onto the large bed and crawled toward the pillows. "Yuushi! Come distract me a little more!" He winked and beckoned to his dark-haired lover.

"Yes, of course," he whispered. Nimble fingers popped the button on his pants as he started a teasingly slow journey towards his boyfriend.

Zeal was evident on Gakuto's face; he was wholly satisfied with this response.

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><p><strong>NB: <strong>"Xanthous" is an almost obsolete word that can be used to describe people with yellow, brown, auburn_, or_ red hair. This challenge wasn't too difficult until I got to "x." Google had to help me search for words that wouldn't feel completely forced. XD;


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